The Upright Life: A Love Letter to Suspenders
Suspenders are not a trend. They are not ironic, nor quaint, nor the domain of steampunk cosplayers and Depression-era reenactors. They are, quite simply, the most dignified method ever devised for keeping one’s trousers in place.
I wear them daily.
Not just on stage or in public, not only when my vest is pressed and my bowtie sharp, but always. Even when no one sees them. Especially then. Some folks wear matching socks to feel secretly powerful. I wear suspenders. They whisper, “You are supported,” and they mean it.
Let’s be honest: belts are a compromise. They’re a tension band, a necessary evil pressed into service when fast fashion decided we’d all have the same waist-to-hip ratio. Suspenders, on the other hand, literally, lift you up. They distribute weight from the shoulders instead of squeezing it around the middle. They let your trousers hang naturally, without bunching or sagging, and they do it with elegance.
Of course, they’ve largely vanished from mainstream menswear. You can find entire YouTube channels devoted to shoes, pocket squares, collar types. But suspenders? An afterthought. A costume piece. Something for barbershop quartets or off-duty clowns.
Well. I am off-duty, but I am no clown. (Not officially, at least.)
My suspenders come in colors bright and bold. I keep a small battalion of them in my wardrobe, each clipped or buttoned to pairs of trousers that never see a belt. Some are striped, some solid, some patterned like mischievous neckties that went on strike. Most are hidden beneath vests or coats. A few peek out like secret signals, a flash of red or teal when I reach for a cup of cocoa or adjust my hat.
And yet, almost no one comments on them. Not directly. They sense something, something sharp and upright and subtly strange, but they rarely name it. That’s fine. Suspenders are not for them. They’re for me.
They’re for the mornings when I’m tired and still pulling myself together. They’re for the evenings when the work is done and my coat comes off, but I still want to feel properly dressed. They’re for walking upright through a world that often slouches.
I don’t expect suspenders to make a grand comeback. But perhaps, if you’re reading this, you’re a bit like me. A bit odd around the edges. A bit weary of pants that dig or sag or never sit quite right. You might be surprised what a few shoulder straps can do, not just for your trousers, but for your sense of self.
And if you’re curious where to find a good pair, or how to wear them properly without looking like a banker from 1893… I keep notes. I’ll link those soon.